Bereaved

Trifextra: Week Fifty-Eight

It’s weekend & Trifecta has come up with a real tough cookie this time-at least for me.This is what they have to say about the weekend challenge-

The word lithium comes from the Greek word lithos, which means stone  (http://chemistry.about.com/od/lithium/a/10-Lithium-Facts.htm).  This weekend, we want you to give us a thirty-three response using the word stone as one of your thirty-three words.  You can use any definition of the word that you’d like, but we are specifically looking for serious, well-conceived entries.

Serious & well conceived?Oh,oh,am in deep trouble.Well,have no option but to take the plunge-maybe the stone I pick up will turn out to be a pearl?If not I can at least throw it at someone I dislike,ha!ha!Here comes my submission.

_______________________________________________________________________

 

Bereaved

She sat unmoving,

Tears unshed,

The grief she felt

Left unexpressed.

Life unbearable

No turning back,

Pieces of her heart

Broken apart.

Future imperfect,a frigid zone

Forever her heart was etched in stone.

                        

                           —————————X—————————-

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54 thoughts on “Bereaved

  1. Atreyee, I really, really like this! I actually read it twice to let it sink in. Very well done. Plus I also like the part about “the stone I pick up will turn out to be a pearl?” 😉

    • (A big grin) 😀 Thank you Sandra,glad you liked the pearl part & ignored the stone throwing part;-)To be honest, it came as in real life I have this bad habit of saying that “let me go throw stones at.(whomever is irritating me then for eg a passer by who is singing loudly at odd hours)-so its a standing joke between me & my daughter,lol!

      Re the poem,am glad you stopped by to read & comment-I am very apprehensive if it fits the bill-so thank you:-)Am off to read a few ,starting with your’s now-will catch up with the rest later tonight(its around 7.20 pm here) & tomorrow 🙂

    • Aww Suzanne,you are so supportive,thank you so much:-)I have just clicked on Sandra’s link-going to read & comment on a few.Can’t wait to read your’s:-)

  2. I thought this was great! Don’t discount it’s pearlescence! I think we’ve all reacted to the loss of something/someone in an icy, stoney fashion before. I get this!

  3. This line is lovely:

    “Future imperfect,a frigid zone”

    I can’t think of a more eloquent way to describe the loss of a loved one, and the coldness of a future without them.

    Excellent!!

    • Aww Valerie,thank you so much for your wonderful comment-you made my day!That line was my personal favourite as well(sheepish grin).Just left a comment on your fantastic piece-it was a joy to read:-)

    • Ha!ha!Could not resist not adding some light note to this serious post,Janna;-)Am not so much into serious stuff,so this was challenging-happy to note that you liked it:-)

  4. I can only say ditto to the above comments, firstly your intro was one of insecurity of how you thought your piece would work and look what happened….the poetry had just the right amount of rhytm and flowed evenly, the sentiments especially the last two lines ‘bundled’ it all up very nicely. Do not be so harsh on yourself lovey – this was lovely.

    • Aww,that was so heartening to read-thank you for your kind words:-)Love the way you use such beautiful endearments-makes one feel so special,so thank you for that too:-)Yes,you are right.I guess I am insecure about my writing “skills” cos am new to it-a fledgling in comparison to so many stalwarts that I come across every week on Trifecta 😛

      Hoping to be able to hone my a abilities by the end of the year & see my confidence notch up higher,spurred on by such encouraging & warm comments coming my way:-)

    • Thank you so much,am glad you liked it:-)Am sure you can do it too-I never thought I could write fiction when I first started 3 months back but I think I am not doing a bad job :-)I always wrote poetry but only in Hindi-so ,just try,you have good writing skills,you should have no problems-looking forward to your writings:-)

    • Thank you Draug,coming from a fantastic writer like you,I will take this as a big compliment. 😀

      I truly appreciate your taking time to read & comment always 🙂

    • Thank you so much Stacey.Am sure you can do it too,just give it a twirl;-)To be honest,I have written only a few English poems-my forte(if I can call it that :P)has always been poems written in Hindi(with a mix of Urdu)-both understood only by Indians & a few neighbouring countries.So am trying my hand at different styles & genres,thanks to Trifecta & its wonderfully talented & supportive community:-)So glad you stopped by

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