Guilty pleasure

Friday Fictioneers

Its Thursday here but Friday at FF where our lovely hostess Rochelle Wisoff Fields, has set shop again with an interesting photo prompt.This week the photo prompt is by Erin Leary,thank you Erin .As my  regular readers know,writers from all over the world gather at FF,every Friday, to spin a tale based on this prompt in about 100 words, give or take a few.For more details and rules click on the url http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/friday-fictioneers-2/

My 97 words follow the photo prompt below.

copyright-erin-leary-2

Copyright – Erin Leary

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Dusk fell.

Perkins waited near the foggy path.

His wife was away.

Timing had to be perfect.

He wondered if she would come.

He was dying to taste her…

A shadowy figure appeared.

It was her and she held a small bundle.

His greedy mind conjured up ripe images.

He imagined his teeth sinking into tender skin.

Reaching him, she thrust the bundle at him, “God forgive me! This is insane!”

Perkins grabbed it and ripped off the skin.

Blood dribbled down his chin.

Nothing like a juicy steak! High cholesterol be damned!

“Thanks Sis!”

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46 thoughts on “Guilty pleasure

    • Lol Ted 😀 Thanks for reading-loved your take on the prompts on SE-in fact while I was reading it ,I was reminded of a mannequin story we did for FF long back 🙂 I managed to enter SE at the fag end-no 30-not bad for a laggard,eh? 😀 Will start reading the FF entries tomorrow-hope you wrote too?I ma hoping to write a short one for Write on Edge before it closes tonight-let’s see 🙂

  1. You set that up perfectly, especially in this zombie/horror-obsessed group, then drove a steak through our collective hearts! Well done. The only thing that doesn’t seem to me to fit is “He was dying to taste her…” It’s certainly deceives, but unless the steak is a “she”, it doesn’t seem right.

    Glad you’re back and feeling better! Have a wonderful weekend.

    janet

    • Thank you Janet both for the comment and for pointing out that gap:-)I see where I went wrong-thank you for pointing out-guess,English not being a first-or even second language makes many fall into such traps 😛

      Let me try to explain what I meant there-it was meant to be an incomplete thought,”He was dying to taste her juicy/delicious dish/steak”(maybe if I had added the adjective,it would have made sense?).

      Yes,am back but I am finding it difficult to keep up-could read only about 55 of the 122 posts–feel like a limp rag doll,lol!Thankfully it rained today,so the weather is cool 🙂 You have a great week ahead Janet,and thank you again for everything 🙂

  2. Dear Atreyee,

    Oh dear. You really did go for the jugular on this one. I just laughed at the end. Perfect setup for the kill. 😉

    In light of what Janet said, you might consider something like “he was dying for the taste.” It would still insinuate that it was something human or that he was going to bite into the arriving woman’s neck but without ascribing a gender to the steak. English is one of those crazy languages that doesn’t have masculine and feminine nouns.

    Now I’m thinking a rare steak would taste so good. I’m a raging, unashamed carnivore. And I’ve enjoyed devouring your well written piece.

    So good to see you here.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    • Thank you dear Rochelle:-)

      Yes,I agree with both Janet and you and only saw the “trap” I had fallen into after you pointed it out 😛 Yes,I think that usage would have been perfect! Will try to keep in mind and as I just pointed out to Janet,English is definitely a funny language-our National language uses masculine and feminine nouns and it confuses a lot of my first language-mother tongue- users who cannot grasp the concept!

      Thank you so much for the positive feedback and showing me how I can improve my writing which is still at a very nascent stage-highly appreciate it Rochelle 🙂

      Have a great week ahead,love
      Atreyee

      • Dear Atreyee,

        I have a great admiration for anyone fluent in more than one language. I’ve always wanted to be but there aren’t many around who are fluent in Hebrew. Nor am I. 😉 I did get some practice on a trip to Israel in 2006. Also I had 6 years of Spanish between high school and college. I can still carry on a rudimentary conversation and do have a few Hispanic friends who are patient with me. I’m told I’m good at accents. Ah well… I said that to say that’s how I know about masculine and feminine nouns.

        Also I want to encourage you. I’ve seen an improvement in your writing since you’ve started with Friday Fictioneers. It’s fun to watch your progress.

        Enjoying a day off.

        Shalom,

        Rochelle

      • 6 years? You know so many languages!Wow!We had Sanskrit for 3 years in school-my daughter did 4 years of French but I sadly lack the knack 😉

        Thank you for the encouragement and am glad there has been some improvement 😛

        Enjoy your day 😀
        Love
        Atreyee

  3. Atreyee, That was a well-written and humorous story. XD I, like others, was expecting a vampire and got a rare meat lover. 🙂 He better bury any bones before his wife gets home. Although, maybe he also eats the bones. —Susan

  4. Dear Altreyee, WONDERFUL STORY! You did this so well! Pulled me in just like a fish on a line and I was so pleasantly surprised at his meat-eating sneakiness! Very well done! Love it! Nan 🙂

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